Dating as a single mom


The growing of social media, technology and societal expectations makes dating become even harder. 
Throw being a single mom into the mix, it becomes almost impossible. Meeting someone in person or 
without the expectation of sex is rare now. In every stage of being single there has been a challenging 
aspect. First it was the pandemic, then it was adjusting to being single after an abusive relationship and 
now it's being a mom. I'm thankful for each stage as I've learned from each one and grew as an individual 
without needing another person, but that doesn't make it any easier. 

I've been single for over 6 months and am still unsure what being ready to date again really means. 
Am I ready to meet someone new, let them into my life, eventually meet my son, have everything I 
ever wanted? I have always believed that you shouldn't force something just for the sake of it or to 
settle, especially a relationship. Your happiness is the main priority and having to sacrifice your wants
 and desires isn't something you should have to do. Compromise but not sacrifice. I enjoy going with 
the flow and seeing where things lead, without the added pressure of it needing to go somewhere
 because that is what's expected. 

Dating apps will never be my favourite. I use them out of convenience and boredom most of the time! 
They are great for meeting people and so many people have found success through them and it is how I 
met my sons dad, so I can't complain too much, but the popular apps are being used for quick hookups by 
a lot of people. Hookups and flings are great, but when you aren't necessarily wanting that and you're 
being greeted with chat up lines asking to see your boobs and unwanted pictures, they're not ideal!

Being a single mom has changed how I view apps. I am much more cautious as I have someone else to 
consider. I am not going to bring someone into my sons life who I'm not 100% on. Before being a mom I 
only had to consider myself and it didn't matter as much if it was only me who was heartbroken, but 
bringing a child into the situation means theres the possibility of another broken heart. Being a mom 
means you have a different set of priorities and you can't drop everything to meet someone like you 
might've been able to before. Not everyone understands this. I have received some vile messages because 
I put my son first, as so I should. Telling me I will never meet someone because I'm a single mom. I will 
be played and used. No good person will ever want me. How I'm selfish for putting someone else first. 

Dating is hard. Dating as single mom is hard. Dating in 2024 is hard. 
But when you meet the right person, it's all worth it. 

xoxo
Lea-Mai

5 comments

  1. Probably one of the biggest reasons why I stay away from dating apps is most men are only on there looking for hookups! I hope you navigate your way through this and you meet someone new soon! x

    Lucy Mary

    ReplyDelete
  2. Dating apps... wow, where do we begin? I worked in online dating for years so I'm not in the least bit surprised by what you've said!

    Rosie

    https://www.loverosiee.co.uk

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. They have so much potential, but it's finding the right one I guess x

      Delete
  3. I can imagine there's lots of difficulties when it comes to dating as a single mum. You're so right though about not introducing someone to your child who you're not 100% sure on. I can imagine I'd be incredibly wary.
    Claire.X
    www.clairemac.co.uk

    ReplyDelete