This Time Last Year


The idea of doing this post has been in my head for a while, but I've always pushed it back further and further for some unknown reason. I decided that I just needed to bite the bullet and do it, otherwise I'd never get it done. When I think of this time last year there are so many things that are different. No just friend wise or job wise but even with my mental health and personal achievements. I mainly want to do this post so I can reflect upon the positive things that I've achieved and how far I've come, but also to inspire you guys.

This time last year...September 2015. I would have just started my first year at college and I would be in my Health and Social class. I was scared to come into college (despite it holding 40 students), as I hadn't been in a classroom setting for over 18 months. I was worried to make friends, and was frightened at the thought of going out at lunch. I slowly started to make some friends which made me happier to come into college.

I then switched my course from Health and Social Care to Child Care, as I realised I wanted to work with children in the early years setting. I originally set off to start at level 2, but as I didn't swap my course until December (3 months in) I was unable to do so. Due to swapping courses I was then scared again to make friends and was worried about whether or not I would like it, and if I would get on with the other students.

November 2015, as some of you may know, I got put on medication to help manage my anxiety and depression. The thought of this scared me as well, because I was afraid to feel happy because I hadn't felt it in so long so I had forgotten what it had felt like to not feel depressed and anxious about everything.

December 2015 things slowly started to get better. I made a best friend called Lauren, whom I love to pieces. I started going into town at lunch, which was something I struggled for so long to do. And it was obviously Christmas which made me a much happier person, as it's my favourite time of the year.

The start of this year, I had officially begun my Child Care course and couldn't wait to get back to college to see my friends. January was also the month that I started my work placement. Looking back at this I don't know how I was ever anxious about it, as I love it so much and I love being around children as it's the setting and environment that I wish to work with. I think this was also the month that I started branching about a bit more and doing things that I wouldn't think I would be able to do. One of those being, walking to college.

A lot since last year is a blur as it all blends into one. But I've been going out more, with both friends and family. I started to talk to new people, which has also helped me to meet my boyfriend Liam. I am now able to go into London and Birmingham and be ok and less anxious around big crowds of people. I also got a job working in retail, but unfortunetly I had to quit due to personal reasons. 

Looking back at this time last year I have done so much in such a short amount of time that I never thought was possible. I still get down and have my moments, such as now, in which my anxiety and depression is quite high. However I am (slowly) starting to realise that I have come such a long way since last year where I could barely leave the house, as to where I am now. I'm starting to focus more on the positive and my achievements rather than the negative in my life. I'm not saying that I'm perfect and that everything is easy, but I try to remember that I have a good life with amazing people in it whom I don't want to take for granted.

Tell me 3 of your achievements (big or small) that you've 
accomplished  since this time last year. 

xoxo
Lea-Mai

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