What I'm still learning about autism, whilst being autistic

When it comes to having a 'disorder' you would think that you would know everything about it. Especially 

if you've been diagnosed for 11 years. That's not the case, but even more so with autism. Turns out I was 

pretty clueless and closed off to a lot of things. Whether it be the technical term of an act or event that we 

do or that I was actually doing something that only people with autism do, despite thinking everyone did it 

too. I recently discovered a lot about autism from someone called Paige Layle's tiktoks and I cannot thank 

her enough for giving constant information and educating people on autism.

In an interview with Buzzfeed, Paige spoke about how she decided to start posting educational videos on 

tiktok because of negative comments about autistic people being thrown around and used as jokes, as well 

as constantly being told 'you don't look autistic'. This inspired me to do this post and educate myself 

further on something that I am constantly experiencing 24/7.

I personally have Aspergers which is a form of Autism. They no longer use this term and instead have 

started using the term ASD (autism spectrum disorder). Aspergers is related to autism but is mainly 

characterised towards awkwardness in social interaction. Often the term high and low functioning is used. 

High functioning autism is when an individual has similar abilities to their 'neurotypical' peers, and low 

functioning autism is when an individuals behaviours inhibit their ability to conduct daily life. The high 

and low functioning labels are harmful as it dismisses their abilities and needs and puts people into boxes, 

when every person with autism will be different and no two people are alike. 

STIMMING

Stimming is a self stimulating behaviour that involves repetitive movement or sounds. Similar to an 

addictive habit. Everyone will stim in one way or another, however for people with autism it can feel more 

intense. Stimming might involve things such as flapping their hands, rocking back and forth, moving 

objects, blinking a lot, walking on their tiptoes and many more. These are all safe types of stimming, 

however they can also be dangerous if behaviours include; biting, picking or punching. Autistic people 

will often stim when they are in uncomfortable situations. For example I have a lot of movement in my 

fingers, crack my knuckles and dig my nails in to provide as a form of distraction. 

MASKING

Masking is when someone is performing or acting out a social behaviour that is deemed 'neurotypical' and 

hiding behaviours that aren't deemed acceptable by society. Masking is the idea to fit in and camouflage 

with others. Women are best at this which is why women are harder to diagnose as they don't show 

'typical' autism behaviour and qualities. I realised that I mask a lot and do so without noticing, like most 

autistic people do. I try to fit in and do the same as everyone else, purely to blend in as much as possible.

OBSESSIVE PERSONALITY

Something I've always known about myself is that I get obsessed with things very quickly. Whether that 

be a hobby or a food, I just accepted that it was a part of my personality. It wasn't until I was in college 

that I realised that other people picked up on it too. Lets say I have a crush on someone, I will constantly 

talk about that person as much as I can, but as soon as that goes away I will never mention them again. It 

sounds so minor but my obsessions also work as comfort blankets, so when it goes away and I'm no longer 

interested, I find myself very uncomfortable and unaware of what to do and how to handle situations. 

HYPERSENSESITIVITY

Hypersensitivity comes across that you might just be able to hear and recognise more sounds that others or 

have better eye sight and taste, but it's a very difficult thing to experience. Your sense are heightened 

which makes them uncomfortable and hard to focus and can create a emotional pain throughout your 

body, as it won't go. Sometimes mine will show up in smell and taste, which is why I am a very picky 

eater. The main way I experience this is through sound. A lot of the time this is controlled, however if 

I'm on my phone and listening to a video and the TV is on the background because my parents are 

watching it, I can't process that and my emotions are then heightened. I find myself getting upset and 

angry because it's so intense. The majority of the time this is controlled and I only experience it at home.

AUTISM SPEAKS CHARITY 

I recently learned that Autism Speaks is a charity that you should not support. You hear the word charity 

and automatically assume they are doing good and everything in their power to help people. Unfortunately 

this isn't the case. Less than 4% of the money that is donated goes to helping families and the majority of 

their money goes to finding a cure for autism as they believe it is a disease. Autism Speaks does not speak 

for autistic people they are against people with autism. There are many articles and evidence out there 

about why Autism Speaks is a charity you should not donate too.

Autism is not a disability. It's a different ability.

xoxo

Lea-Mai