Why I'm no longer talking about my relationship

If you happen to know me personally, then you will know that I am a huge romantic. Everything
from; holding doors open, writing letters, going on dates without your phone and so much more. But
also love the newer side of romance where you can show your love off to the world. There is more of
a downside to that. I've always been open when talking about my relationship, I know what to and not
to say about it to others, but especially when it comes to the internet. This year has been one that I
won't forget and we're only 4 months in. So much has happened and changed, but I've also learnt so
much about myself and what I need to do in order to be the best person I can be.

I'm not going to sit here and pretend like I have my life together because I definitely do not. I am far
from that, especially when it comes to the love and relationship department. I know what I want out
of a relationship and I'm not going to write it down or tell people because unfortunately, it can be
used against me in order to please someone else. I love love. There is no better feeling that being in
love with someone and having that connection between you. There is no denying that.

For years I've always known that I have an addictive and obsessive personality. This is portrayed in
many ways, but lately I've noticed it a lot in person. Meaning I get attached to people after only a few
conversations and I fall hard. When I love I love hard, and it's the same when I have crushes and lust
after people. I mould myself into what they want, without noticing myself what I'm doing. I start
listening to their type of music, researching their hobbies and find myself asking permission to do
something. This is in no way their fault, in fact they have no idea I'm doing it. As a result of this I
have been hurt. A lot. A hell of a lot. I think we all change when we start to like people or get in
relationships, which is normal, however I tend to take it a bit extreme.

I've started to become more open with others, who I like, and tell them about myself. This has
gone a lot better than I thought, but I  cut them off anyway because I'm scared of being hurt and
end up hurting myself instead. Opening up has made me more vulnerable and exposed and since
blogging and being online is a huge part of my life I've slowly learnt what i find comfortable talking
about online. I will happily continue to talk about my mental health, sex and everything else, but
when it comes to my relationships I don't think I will be as open. They are very personal and special
to me but they also involve another person who I have to think off. If I ever get married or have
children then I will mostly talk about that, because it will be a huge part of my life, but that's not
happening for a long time, so for now I'm going to be keeping my relationship private.

And yes I am still single, for those probably wondering after reading this!



  1. I'm glad your happy being single, sometimes rushing in and looking for somebody new isn't the best thing.

    Amy x
    The July Rose

    1. Definitely! Have to learn to love yourself before you can love someone else x

  2. Love this! I'm exactly the same, I get attached to people so quickly. You've sometimes got to take a step back and think about what you're doing xx

    Megan Elizabeth

    1. It's so easy to get attached now especially with everything being online. Always put yourself first x

  3. Good for you, this is your space and your channel so you have every right to share and not share what you want to - I'm the same with my own wedding!

    1. It's so hard sometimes, because I love being open with everyone, but this is definitely something that needs to happen x

  4. I don't blame you - I've spoken so openly about past relationships and it can be awkward when they sadly end can't it x

    1. Definitely! You almost get put in a weird position where you have to explain yourself even though you shouldn't have too x