Why the stigma around sex toys needs to end | AD

This is an AD with your pleasure toys

We're about to go into 2020, a new decade, and people are still scared to talk about sex toys because
of the stigma around them, yet over 50% of people use them. I'm a very open person and find sex a
really interesting topic to talk about. I love talking about sex with my partner and friends, but it's also
important to have that conversation with your parents/family. I find people are ok talking about sex,
to a certain extent (nothing too TMI), but nobody ever mentions sex toys because we're scared.

I've always known what sex toys were and the basic terminology and usage for them, but that was
about it. I didn't know anyone who used them or even heard of them talked about regularly. Nothing
was ever mentioned during sex education in school, which I definitely think they should add. The first
time I ever saw them and had questions was when I walked into a store and saw them at the back.
Since then I've become more interested in educating myself in them and how they're actually healthy
to use, both in and out of relationships.

"Having sex toys as an accessory in the bedroom brings another element and excitement to sex. 
They are great for experimenting and can help you discover new things, that you may like or not. 
Sex toys can result in better and more intense orgasms and a healthier relationship with sex and a 
better sex life for me and my partner" - female, 21

"Adds that extra something to the bedroom and are sexy when a women uses them 
during penetration" - male, 22

I bought my first sex toy in 2016 at the age of 17. I had not long been with my boyfriend and had just
become sexually active and wanted to try new things, as well as understand my own body more.
There are so many toys out there to choose from that I got so overwhelmed. I started with a basic
bullet and loved it. It's definitely important to start of with the more basic and smaller sex toys and
work your way up, so you can get used to everything, know what you like and what works with and
for your body as well as understanding what each sex toy does.

If over 50% of people use sex toys, then why aren't people talking about them? Because of the 
stigma.  Sex toys aren't just those who are single, haven't had sex or are lonely. Not matter what your 
status is, you can use them. Sometimes they are beneficial and provide people with more freedom.  
For instance if you have some form of disability, you may find sex uncomfortable or painful, but sex 
toys allow you to have full control. They are not dirty or gross, they are healthy and fun to use.

Recently I discovered a new website for luxury sex toys and want to buy everything. Your pleasure 
toys is the UK's official home of Tracy's Dog. They are most known for their suction vibrator, after a
review went viral online. I was so excited when they said they wanted to work with me and send me
2 of their products out. I chose the suction vibrator and the beads bunny vibrator.

The suction vibrator uses a unique suction technology to stimulate a sucking sensation whilst
providing internal stimulation at the same time. This is waterproof, so can be used in the shower, 
and will last up to 30 minutes. It has 10 vibration and 10 suction modes alongside pulsating patterns
and ribbed texture. It's all controlled by 1 button that is located on top of the suction area, for total
control, starting of small and building up intensity. This is rechargeable and comes with a small cable,
so you don't have to worry about having the right batteries in the house.

"I've only ever used them on women, not on myself. It's a great way for stimulation when you are 
single rather than generic masturbation. They are also great for those days when you aren't 
necessarily feeling like having sex, but still want something" - male, 25

The beads bunny vibrator is designed to target and reach the female 'sweet spot'. This has a 360° 
rotation with beads inside the shaft, with a switch to change between rotating clockwise and 
counterclockwise. This has 7 speeds for vibration and 5 speeds of shaft rotation for endless internal 
pleasure, with a flexible vibrating bunny for external pleasure. This is also rechargeable and comes 
with an cord for charing, so you don't have to mess around or worry about batteries. 

Both of the vibrators are silicone, which makes them safe to use and also easy to clean. When using a 
lubricant, make sure to use a water based lube rather than a silicone based lube due to added bacteria 
as well as lasting longer over time. The toys themselves are really pretty, being in a bright purple with 
gold accents, rather than a regularly flesh or monchrome shade. These are a game changer in the 
bedroom and I definitely recommend trying them out if you're looking for that extra added 
something, both in or out of a relationship.

"Sex toys are fun and add that extra something. People think that if you use sex toys then you are 
lacking something, which isn't the case. There are so many different options available and as long 
as you both are happy thats all that matters" - female, 45.

I know that a lot of people, especially men, feel that if their partner suggests using a sex toy in the 
bedroom, that they feel they aren't good enough. Men can often find sex toys degrading because of 
the lack of information out there, as well as the majority of sex toys being available for women. If a 
women uses a sex toy they are perceived as powerful and independent but when a man uses one they 
are perceived as desperate. This isn't the case. I think a man using a sex toy is just as sexy and strong 
as a women using one. There is no difference. This is a conversation that we've been having for years, 
but aren't talking about enough. It's time for that to end, as well as the sex toy stigma. 


This is an AD in partnership with Your Pleasure Toys. See disclaimer page for more information.


  1. It's so great that you're opening up a conversation around sex and sex toys! You're right, I think it's important that people normalise it more.
    Soph - https://sophhearts.com x

    1. Thank you! I definitely think we need to talk about it more, so people can have a healthier relationship with sex x

  2. I bloody love sex toys and you're so right, the stigma definitely needs to end as they are fantastic! x

    1. They're great and not enough people talk about them. I find the stigma to be mainly around men, which is upsetting x

  3. It's an interesting post to read that's for sure! It shouldn't have negative connotations though, it's a shame, I guess however that people are more open to it now than say, 20 years ago etc.

    Amy x
    The July Rose

    1. Thank you! Definitely, I'm still cautious with who I talk about them too, but I wish we didn't have to be x

  4. Love this post - as you can imagine it's right up my street haha! I did a similar post earlier on in the year, I hate that there's a stigma around sex toys and that we feel "embarrassed" talking about them. I alway say that I wish that women felt more comfortable opening up about their sex lives including self pleasure!


    1. I couldn't agree with you more! I felt so nervous even to post this, because I didn't know how people would react but I'm so glad I did, and it's actually one of my favourites posts I've ever done x

  5. Yes yes yesss! Love this post! It should definitely be spoken about more!x


    1. Thank you! I can't wait to do more posts on this topic, and the taboo/stigma around it x