How I started living the life I want to live


Over the 2 years I have changed, a lot. All for the better. I have achieved so much in such a small amount 
of time, that I never thought would be possible and if I did, not for a long time. There are a few things that 
lead to this happening, from relationships to a national pandemic. I am a huge believer in everything 
happens for a reason, whether you know it now or not. This journey lead to me starting to live the life that 
I want to live, for myself and not to please another person or do something because it's wheat's expected. 

All of this started because I came out of a 3 1/2 year relationship. For the first time since I was 17 I was on 
my own. I decided to do things that never interested me before such as drinking, going out, experimenting 
etc. Within 2 months the first lockdown hit and I turned 21. I was still going to work but having to find 
something to fill the majority of my day with, since I couldn't go out. It was around this time that I 
realised if I wanted something, then I had to do it, because the world was changing and nobody knew 
what to expect. I'm always going to be a person who's afraid of the consequences and doing wrong, 
but I wasn't scared to do something purely because someone else might not like it. 

In society they tell you, to settle down, get married, have kids and the perfect house all by a certain age. 
That everyone should want that and doing the opposite is frowned upon. But why? Yes I want all of that, 
but I'm only 22 and shouldn't be in such a hurry to have my life together. If I want to be single and have 
casual sex then I will do so. If I want to live alone, I will do so. Nothing I do is to please another person. 

Over the last 2 years, my mental health has been on a huge journey. From being off and on medication, 
new jobs and career paths, moving out and living alone right down to abusive relationships. All of this has 
made me realise that nothing else matters as long as you are happy. If it means getting rid of those toxic 
people in your life to be happier, then so be it. You are and always will be the most important. 

Right now I am on my way to becoming the happiest I've ever been. I am single, living alone, in a new 
career that I can see taking me a lot further and that I actually enjoy going too, setting plans and going out 
with friends and family. If I don't want to do something then I wont. I have started standing up for myself 
and not letting people walk all over me. If I want to treat myself to something then I will, because what 
else is that money going to be used for? All of this because I realised I come first. 

Live the life you want to live, not the life they expect you too. 

xoxo
Lea-Mai

12 comments

  1. I had a similar experience with my first relationship. dated for almost 4 years and was single when i turned 21. it was great because i went out a lot more, met new people and just had the college experience i wanted i didn't have in the beginning. i made up for lost time in a sense.

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    1. That's exactly what happened to me. Gained experience and had stories to tell, rather than spending my youth locked away x

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  2. I am so happy to read that you are going for the life that you want to live, that is an amazing attitude to have! x

    Lucy Mary

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  3. So glad you're feeling so positive and good on you for going after what you want!
    Amy x
    callmeamy.co.uk

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    1. Taken a while to get here, but definitely worth it x

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  4. Yes to all of this! I'm so pleased to read that you're going for it. Good on you! I'm sure your best years are yet to come!

    Claire.X
    www.clairemac.co.uk

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  5. This was such a joy to read, I'm so pleased for you. You've been on such a journey and I'm so proud of how you've handled yourself and continue to strive for positivity!
    Rosie

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    1. Thank you! For the first time, I can actually say that I'm proud of myself and the journey that I've been on x

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  6. I'm 27 going on 28 and still not fully settled down. I don't live with my boyfriend, we have a very complicated blended family and 3 kids between us. I think we should all live life the way we want to and not how society expects, being happy is what's important!

    Gemma Louise

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    1. I think it depends on what your idea of settled down is. Everyone has their own interpretations! I definitely agree with doing what you want to be happy x

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