Being completely honest, I never thought about turning 20. Didn't even cross my mind. There are a lot of things that have happened in my life that made me think I wouldn't get here. I know 20. Not that big of a number on the scale of age. Many would say that my life hasn't even started yet. I would say I've had plenty of experiences to last me a life time. All of this has led to me having quite a lot of life lessons that I've grown and learnt from to get me to where I am now. I'm in no way near done learning and growing into the person I want to be, but these are the lessons I've already learnt.
Have 5 quality friends, rather than 50 fake ones
This is something I was always told growing up. It's better to have a few close people to you
who matter and care than loads who look good on the outside, but don't value you as a person.
Not everyone will like you and you won't like everyone. That's ok
I've always struggled with this because I've never understood what I've done not to be liked. However
I dislike people who haven't done anything bad or towards me and thats ok. Not everyone gets along.
You are too kind to people that aren't worthy of you
Since I was young I always spoil the people around me and care about everyone. Truth is, some
people just aren't worthy of it. You will always continue to be kind, but others don't respect it.
Stop focusing on others and focus on yourself
Social media is a hard one to use and still apply this in your life. The confidence that comes from
others is when they realise who they are and stop pretending to be someone they aren't. Do the same.
Mental health is one of the most important things
No matter where I am or who I'm with, my mental health will always come first. It's better to make
sure yourself is ok, rather than pretending it's not on the outside. It's too important to loose.
Leave time for yourself (bubble baths, face masks and Netflix)
Everyone you will ever meet will feel run down and burnt out at some point, even if they don't like to
admit it. Instead of waiting till then to focus on you, do it now. Give yourself the time you need.
Value memories and experiences not materialistic things
I always spent my money as soon as I got it because I liked the idea of having loads of items and nice
things. Reality is they can be gone in an instant, but memories and experiences will always be there.
Following the fashion trends, really doesn't matter
Just because you bought the 'GEEK' top from a cheap retailer, rather than the original from Topshop,
doesn't make any difference. Trust me, you'll look back and wonder what the hell was that.
High school isn't fun for everyone
I was always told that; 'you'll miss high school once you're gone'. It's been 4 years and I don't. At all.
High school was miserable and horrific for me. It might be fun for most people, but its ok if it's not.
Money isn't everything - but it does help
Going out and earning £30,000 a year isn't everything in life. However having that money will help.
Don't live to work, work to live.
Stop planning everything to the minute
As much as I love planning, organising everything and sticking to a routine, when things don't
happen that way I get very stressed out. Have days where you just go with the flow and do whatever.
It's ok to cry in public
We've all had that feeling in the back of your throat when you want to cry but you're around a bunch
of people. LET IT OUT. Don't hold it in. It's ok to cry and it's even more ok to cry in public.
Family is everything
Friendships will come and go but family is forever. If you have no-one there for you, you're family
will always be there. Family is a permanent, forever group of friends.
Having a man doesn't define you
As much as I love being in a relationship, having that man in your life doesn't define who you are as a
women or as a person. You will always be you're own person and do what you want to do in life.
Don't follow the crowd
Being another sheep in the crowd will only get you lost, instead be the leader. Make your own rules,
set your own boundaries, be your own boss and be the person you want to be when you grow up.
Follow your gut feeling
Truth is, your gut is always right. If something doesn't feel right, no matter what, don't do it. Your
heart will want the perfect fantasy, but you're gut knows what really to do.
Experiment
Whether this be with your fashion, hair, nails, sexuality, friends, relationships. Would you rather live
a boring life saying what if, or a fun life saying look at that?
Don't take people for granted
One day, we will all be gone. From friendships, to materialistic things and especially family. Visit
your Nan and Grandad, go to the family get together. You'll regret it once they're gone.
You won't always get along with family
I don't see a lot of my family and it took me a long time growing up to realise that it's ok. Don't
surround yourself with negative people just because they're family. The family that is there matters.
Reading is really important
No reading that Facebook status' and tweets, doesn't count. Make sure to read a book. Not only does
it give you the ability to escape reality, but the freedom of knowledge and understanding.
xoxo
Lea-Mai
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