The truth about relationships

I love talking about my relationship. It's my favourite thing to do. I love talking about our memories, 
him as a person, how well we work and how far we've come. However when I say that we've been 
together for 3 years I'm always met by the same response; "Wow! That's a long time". But it's really 
not. The only reason we think 3 years is a long time to be in a relationship is because we're so used
 to throwing them away and giving up straight away when things don't go a certain way.

Look at our grandparents and their parents for instance. They would have had arguments, money 
problems, conflicts, pressure and all the same problems that we do. But they were taught to talk about 
their problems and resolve them through communication which we aren't. We're taught that there is 
always better out there, but in reality if we carry on like that aren't we all going to end up alone?

I spent so much time at the beginning of my relationship, over analysing everything and questioning 
why it was going so well. I shouldn't be questioning myself about how happy I am in my 
relationship? I struggled with the fact that it was working so well, yet it was my first relationship. 
We all dream of our first relationship, first date and first time all being with the same person, but I 
don't know anybody who is the same age or within 7 years of me who has that.  I was so scared that 
it wasn't going to work, based purely upon how other peoples relationships ended up.

Yes my first ever date was with Liam, but I wasn't his. Yes Liam was only the second person 
I'd kissed, but I wasn't his. I spent so long wondering why and is it too good to be true? All 
because people had been in 3 or 4 relationships by the time I had my first, or because my dating 
life is the complete opposite of Liam's.

We're taught that we should date around because there will always be better, and you never know what you'll like. We're taught to get into a committed relationship, move out, engaged, married and  have children all at specific ages. What's wrong with being with 1 person for your entire life, or not being in a relationship or having children until you're 30, or wanting to focus on your career and not wanting to have children. Society has taught us that women have a biological clock and that if we don't have children by the time we're 30, there's not point. And that if we don't get married, we'll never truly be happy. Or if you've been with someone for 3 years you should have already hit certain milestones.

I'm 20 and Liam is 22. We often get asked, nudges or winks revolving around baby and marriage 
questions, purely based upon the fact of our relationship length. If we were 10 years older and only 
just started dating, would it be the same? No. Yes we want all those things and no matter what your 
age is, you should always have those conversations to make sure you're on the same page, however 
isn't it up to us as a couple and 2 individuals as to when we do those things.

Moving out has become the biggest topic for us. We get so many questions about when we're 
moving out but the truth is, we'll move out when we're ready. We have a goal in mind, but society, 
older generations and even family expect it to happen within a certain time frame, purely based upon 
what they perceive from the outside. We want to be better off financially but also mentally, because
 if you're not 100% ready then it wont work and it'll only become worse.

Just because you aren't moving forward at the same pace as others, doesn't mean 
your relationship is bad. It means that you're moving at different paces 

Ever since me and Liam started dating, we have kept things from places we have gone, memories 
made, notes written, souvenirs bought and we've made 2 scrapbooks and a memory box out of them. 
A lot of couples in todays society and generation stores everything on their phones because it's quick 
and easy but we take the time to value each individual memory to look back on in the future.

There are so many events that we haven't captured because we want to be present and exist with each 
other rather than posting selfie on snapchat and Instagram to show our relationship off to others.

This generation and society has made it seem like materialistic things and luxuries are what make a 
relationship, rather than honesty, loyalty and communication. Conversations become texts, arguments 
become phone calls, sex became easy instead of being about love, trust is never established and 
cheating has become an 'accident', leaving relationships harder to have and find. Men are taught to be 
tough, macho and not cry, but why? I think a real man is someone who shows his true emotions, 
shows off his partner, stays loyal and truly shows that they are the loves of their lives, instead of 
being a man by flirting with everyone and not paying attention. 

The truth about relationships is, that you have to communicate, work together, value and respect 
one another to make it work. You have to really want each other and want a future together because 
without 100% coming from both parties, you won't get anywhere. We need to stop listening to society 
when they say there's better out there when we are already beyond happy and have the relationship 
that we've always dreamt of. Don't get me wrong, no relationship is perfect. Everyone argues, 
disagrees and wishes the other person would do more but every relationship is like that.

You can't give up on someone because the situation is not ideal. Great relationships aren't great 
because they have no problems. They're great because both people care enough about the other 
person to find a way to make it work.



  1. You guys are so cute together! Don't let other people get to you x

    Joyce |

  2. I hate that everyone thinks you need to be coupled off and engaged/married in your 20s, I'm 25 and still single (albeit with a child but still) and I'm happy as I am! Love being single, you do you I say!

    Gemma Louise

    1. That's what I've never understood. So many people get married later in life or stay single etc. As long as you're happy, nothing else matters x

  3. I definitely get what you mean with relationships seeming to become more materialistic/text based! I'm in a LDR so we're texting constantly and the most, and it does become very taxing and I'd like the break from my phone! Can't wait for us to move because relationships are the best when you're just living in the moment together and having a good time!

    1. Living in the moment is the best part of being in a relationship. I'd rather have memories and experiences than photos (even though they're nice to look back on too) x

  4. Your relationship is exactly that, yours, nobody else's so there is no need to compare it to others :) You look really happy together and that is all that matters.

    Amy x
    The July Rose

  5. So much has changed over the years. Others seem to judge your relationship(sometimes when theirs aren't so great themselves). The only opinions of your relationship that matters are your own. Do what you wanna do, kids or no kids, marriage or no marriage. Just be happy x

    Lauren | By Lauren May

  6. I loved reading this - the amount of comments you get on your relationship about moving out, marriage and kids is ridiculous! Me and my boyfriend completely ignore them - we know what we want in life and that is nobody else's business! x