Truths about your first time

This is not my photo

Your first time isn't exactly one of the most romantic things. It can be for some people, but for the majority of us having sex for the first time is a different experience to say the least. You're not
going to hear slow music or look over your shoulder to see candles in the distance. Finding someone you want to have sex with for the first ever time, is a very intimate thing for a lot of people. Some people don't mind who they sleep with and that is perfectly fine for them. For me personally and
a lot of people I know, they wait until they find that special someone.

Before reading I just want to emphasize that this is based on
 my personal opinion and that I 
can not speak on behalf of
others and their personal experiences.

Through out my teenage years and ever since I could remember, I knew I wanted to find someone who cared for me before I had sex. That wasn't something my parents wanted me to do or was pressured into, it was just my choice. When I thought about having sex for the first time I thought it was going to feel like it was all in slow motion and the most amazing thing in the world. In fact is was a spur of the moment thing that we both agreed to do, and that was that.

The main thing I remember from my first time was the blood. As it was my first time my hymen
(also known as the cherry  popped) broke. This makes it sound a lot worse than what it is. Some people don't have one, some people do. If you are someone who does, then after you first have sex it will brake causing it to bleed. I didn't feel it break or hear it, in fact I didn't even know about it until I saw it. Thankfully the person I was with understood completely. He stripped the bed, put it in for a wash, made the bed again, got the shower ready for me and comforted me to make sure I was ok.

I also remember that it wasn't the most comfortable thing, in fact it was relatively painful. Unless
you have experienced it then you won't known what I mean when I say it's a very strange pain. It's not like a 'normal' pain. I would describe it as more uncomfortable. In that intimate moment you
don't focus on the 'pain', you focus on the person you are with and focus on the moment itself.

 Nobody cares if you are still a virgin.
You won't hear or feel your 'cherry' pop.
It can be over really quickly.
You might need to use some lube, which is normal.
It's ok not to enjoy sex for the first time, or ever.
Every single experience is different.
Don't expect to have an orgasm.
It is not going to be the same as it is in porn.
You don't have to tell anyone if you don't want to.
If you don't have a hymen, it doesn't mean you're not a virgin.
A man and a women isn't the only way to loose your virginity.

You might be wondering why I have done this post and what is the point in it. To be honest,
I don't know the reason behind it myself. I guess it's mainly to not glamourise it, and not to
give people false hope. To be more real and open with guys. Having sex isn't scary as long
as you are comfortable with what you are doing, both people have given consent and it is what
you want to do without being pressured.

Do what makes you comfortable, not for anyone else.
It is well and truly a beautiful mess.


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